It’s also a very specific time in life, and girls are mentally and emotionally maturing a bit quicker at 13 maybe.” You can’t not be deep when you’ve been buried. “I feel like our culture asks boys ‘What do you like to do?’ and asks girls ‘Who are you?’ I think there’s an immense interior mental pressure put on girls, so ‘deep’ is kind of their starting point. “I think our culture forces girls to ask deeper questions of themselves earlier than boys,” he says. Girls tended to talk about their souls, boys about things like video games. (This, I know, could be its own feature story.) For girls, the transition to middle school is usually when they start to grasp what society really expects from females.īurnham saw this when he was prepping for his movie, as he watched hundreds of adolescents’ vlogs online. Although girls and boys are both affected negatively as they move into adolescence, boys tend to lose their way later, and often in less self-directed ways. “Girls in middle school are hitting the culture in very ferocious ways,” says Niobe Way, Ed.D.'94, a professor of developmental psychology at New York University and author of several books, including Deep Secrets. And culture is what leads you at that age, I think.”Įspecially, it seems, for girls. “There’s been a lot of progress made, but the cultural pressures are still insane.
When headlines in The New York Times read, “Confident at 11, Confused at 16.”Īlmost no one I talked to, including Bo Burnham, the director of Eighth Grade, was surprised that despite the progress made - the better grades, the better opportunities - middle school girls were still suffering. I pulled out some of my books from the early 1990s, when I first dipped into this subject, when girl struggles were first being studied in depth. To guidance counselors and parents, to friends and coworkers and middle schoolers. I started talking to academics and developmental psychologists. So why was she also painfully awkward and seemingly friendless? Why haven’t things gotten better for middle school girls? And why, I wondered, are we still having these conversations? Kayla, the protagonist in Eighth Grade, was smart, creative, and kind. Women outnumber men in college, especially women from low-income and minority families. They are doing better academically, outperforming boys in English and language arts, and often in math. They are more likely to sign online petitions and volunteer. As The New York Times article pointed out, girls today are seizing opportunities previously unavailable to them. Have things really not gotten better for girls? My friends were in middle school 25, 30 years ago.
They talked about scenes that resonated with them. As we left the theater, several of the women immediately started talking about their own middle school experiences - how uncomfortable they felt, how horrible it was.
Cute middle schoolers movie#
Around the same time, a group of us saw the movie Eighth Grade, about an apprehensive 13-year-old girl enduring the last week of middle school. Friends were telling me stories about their struggling daughters, particularly around social media and feeling left out. The piece came on the heels of a slew of recent research that showed a rise in depression and anxiety and a dip in confidence for girls, especially as they enter middle school. They are seizing opportunities closed to previous generations - in science, sports, and leadership.”Īnd then I read the second paragraph: “But they’re also getting another message: What they look like matters more than any of that.” For 12-year-olds on the cusp, we've included a few teen costume ideas rated PG-13.Last September, T h e New York Times came out with a story with a promising opening paragraph that made me happy: “Girls have been told they can be anything they want to be, and it shows.
We've also got plenty of ideas for classics like DIY superhero costumes, as well as best friend Halloween costumes if they want to pair up with their middle school BFF. To get you started, we’ve rounded up our favorite DIY Halloween costumes for tweens, ranging from cute to cool to (just a little) scary. Of course, it helps to have ideas as a jumping-off point. Here's the secret: Let your tween take the lead in choosing their costume, then help them make it. But, we’re here to tell you to put away the caution tape-or save it for the outdoor Halloween decorations. And you must always beware the dreaded eye roll. Kid costumes? They're over it, but they're not ready for adult costumes either. Congratulations, you have a tween, that beautiful age between 9 and 12 years old when things get a bit trickier, especially come Halloween.
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